4 Tensions All Leaders Face (And How To Deal With Them)
Great leaders don't just make great decisions and inspire people. They also know how to manage the tensions that come with being a leader.
So what are some of those tensions, and can we do about them? Here are some of the biggest ones that I have experienced and what I've learned.
1. Innovating for the future while honoring the past
Great leaders know the importance of innovation and change. The saying "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" is not a mantra effective leaders live by. We all know that nothing lasts forever (especially in our day and age), and so leaders today must be flexible, always learning, and willing to try new things in order to stay ahead.
The challenge, of course, is that too much change too fast often isn't good. And change without recognizing the impact "the way things used to be done" had on people is often hurtful to those who were impacted by the old way of doing things.
The solution? Be honest about the risks you are taking when you try new things and don't speak of the way things "used to be done" as less-than. They aren't less-than, there were just a different way of doing things in a different time.
Innovation and change are always tricky, but honoring the past while leading needed change so makes it much more likely more people will get on board.
2. Sticking to your convictions while empathizing with those who disagree
Effective leaders are so because they are consistent and focused on what they're trying to do. But it can be hard when people disagree with your approach, belief system, or what exactly it is you are trying to do. And while there are certainly times when we get things wrong, part of leading means leading people to a better place, even if the journey to get there isn't always rainbows and butterflies.
It can be hard to tell people no or to stick to a conviction you know some people may not like. But as a leader, you already know that if your goal is to please everyone you'll likely please no one (and get little accomplished).
It can be hard to have difficult conversations with people who may not like your stance on an issue. So the challenge is not to change your convictions, but to empathize with those who disagree while not compromising what you are trying to do.
Listen to their concerns, make sure others feel heard, and even thank them for sharing why they think what they do. The goal is not to persuade everyone to agree with you, but for them to know that you care.
People who feel cared for and heard will follow a leader even when they don't always agree.
3. Making the best decision while being misunderstood
In Larry Osborne's book Lead Like A Shepherd, he writes that one of the biggest things he has to teach young leaders is the ability to lead while knowing you will be misunderstood.
His point is that as a leader, you will have much more information and a lot more considerations to think about than the average person in your church (or business). And so, you will have to make decisions that are best for your organization that other people will question and even disagree with because they don't know everything you know.
Instead of always trying to explain every single reason why you make each decision, leaders must be comfortable with knowing people often disagree (or may even think you're doing more harm than good) because they don't have all of the facts. It comes with the territory of being a leader.
So we must empathize and be clear on the direction we are taking, knowing that we will be misunderstood by some. The better you can live in that tension, the more effective of a leader you will be.
4. Being confident in what you are doing while being humble enough to continue to grow
One of my biggest shortcomings when we planted New City Church was my insecurities as a leader. I was constantly worried about questions people might ask me and how I would respond, or how I would actually get people to buy-in to what we were trying to do. I operated a lot out of fear.
Now, of course, leaders ought to be humble and recognize we don't know everything. At the same time, leaders must have a level of confidence in what they are doing. This creates a tension.
People naturally gravitate and will follow people who have a vision for what they want to do and confidence in the good it will bring about. No one wants to follow someone who is always afraid or second-guesses every decision they make.
I can only speak from my personal experience these last few years, but for me this has meant being more confident in who I am and what we are doing as a church. It means always being willing to listen and get feedback from others, while at the same time sticking to the convictions I know to be good of our church (even if that means not everyone will always like everything we do).
This is not about being prideful but about being willing to lead, even knowing you will sometimes get it wrong. The best leaders I know are ones who aren't afraid to lead and stick to their convictions while at the same time are humble and always willing to learn. It's a tension that great leaders have learned to navigate well.
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